Scratch

“Let's grab some musical instruments and prepare to rock ourselves out with some sloppily and disorderly, mostly-wrong-lyrically, karaoke.”

Scratch is a small, and often inebriated, skeleton who loves to jam out with Timesprites as well as wax philosophically about the meaning of life. He once signed a music contract with the legendary Tim Talent. The tour was to include over 57,000 stops, spread through 3,600 years. One of the stipulations was that Scratch would never be able to return to The Under.

At times Scratch has tried to give up his drinking, but his sobriety generally doesn't last.

Upon his induction to Egglandia, Scratch gifted the Queen the two thumbs of Perry the Professor, which Scratch had stolen while wasted, when Perry called him "small". All of the Professor's knowledge supposedly lies deep within the thumbs, and Scratch has no idea where the rest of Perry's body is.

Variety Hour Act[]

During the Variety Hours, Scratch had his own act - though they were often done unofficially and only as a result of his kidnapping other performers to steal their spot. Eventually, The M.C. gave him his own official place in the lineup. In addition to his normal song list, he would sometimes sing his original song, Be Like the M.C., based on Fly Like an Eagle by Steve Miller Band.

Song Repertoire[]

Ain't No Mountain High Enough by Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell

Ain't No Rest For The Wicked by Cage The Elephant

Are You Gonna Be My Girl by Jet

Be Like the M.C. (original lyrics, based on Fly Like an Eagle by Steve Miller Band)

Bring It On Home to Me by Sam Cooke

Celebration by K.o.o.l, The Gang

Clint Eastwood by Gorillaz

Everything's Gonna Be Alright by Bob Marley

Help Yourself by Tom Jones

In My Life by the Beatles

I Feel Good by James Brown

I Would Walk 500 Miles by The Proclaimers

Misunderstood by Lil Wayne

Money by Pink Floyd

That's Amore by Dean Martin

This Land is Your Land by Woodie Guthrie

Queen Mashup (Somebody to Love, Another One Bites the Dust, Bohemian Rhapsody)

What a Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong

You've Got to Hide Your Love Away by the Beatles

Relationships[]

He was Amelia Earhart's navigator prior to being pulled to The Under

He is married to Small Golden Rose (Timesprite), and their daughter is named Rosie Jr.
He is a member of the Sweeper’s Union
He is bonded to Broomniece (Broom)
He is a member of Egglandia, the Eggxecutive Chanshellor of New Yolk

Quotes[]

"Come on up, doo doo doo."

"I'll catch you in a different here and a different now"

"I swear to drunk I'm not God, officer."

"Note to self, if you dab while holding a full drink you'll spill it all over your bones."

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to The Under's first Variety Hour! This is going to be the least put together act of the evening, yours truly, taking it down. Thank you, it's already been a giant disaster."

"I gotta tell you, though, I don't have good handwriting. It's just going to look like scratches."

"I remember a time before the crobs. That was probably the best of times, and now we're in, meh, just a pretty good time, it's not the worst of times."

"We venture forth into the desert, into the sands of time itself! Time! The new frontier, the forefront frontier that comes first."

"That's right, babies! We're here and we're gonna take over this place one more time again!"

Scratch

Contents

Variety Hour Act[]

Song Repertoire[]

Relationships[]

Quotes[]

Videos[]

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